"Uhmm… Why?" Chris asked, since he wasn't sure he had understood the question that Jhonny had asked him. "I mean…. Why?!"
Jhonny smiled, showing his all too white teeth. "As you may know, *N Sync was planned to be a five members group since the beginning. But for a lot of reasons, we never had the fifth member. We hadn't stop looking for one, though, and you… you're perfect. You got a great alto voice, you can sing, you ain't bad looking, and your name ends with an S."
"I'm also gay and out." Chris pointed out. "And my name ends with an R."
"They call you Chris, right? That ends with an S." Jhonny shook
his head, and licked his lips. "Look, Kirkpatrick. I
know about your past with Joey. I also know that you left him because
a jerk blackmailed you into doing it, and that
you're afraid for Joey's career. Well, too bad. Your problem. But I have
two troubles: First, I need a fifth *N Syncer who can get along with the
group and reaches high parts. Second, I need a great event to take the
eyes away from Backstreet Boys and allow Kevin to divorce without much
fuzz. The way I see it, we both can solve each other's problems. If you're
in, that is."
Chris considered it for a long moment. If he accepted, he could be with Joey. If he didn't, Joey's career was safe.
If he accepted, he could help Howie and Kevin.
If he didn't…
"All right. I'm in."
* * *
"I'm not going." Joey said, crossing his arms. He was sitting on the rehearsal room, where he had been hiding from Jhonny.
"Joey, we have to re-record those tracks." JC explained, patiently.
"They don't even know who the fifth member is." Joey growled.
He didn't want to hear JC's logic, he didn't want
to hear that Jhonny was right. He simply wanted to crawl under a rock
and die.
Because he missed Chris so much he couldn't breath. He had tried everything to contact him. Mails, phone calls, bribing Kate and Emily.
Nothing worked.
But he didn't want to stop trying. Not when stopping meant working on opening a spot in their group for an intruder.
He wasn't going to do that.
"Very well. I'll call the others and we'll concentrate on the new choreography."
Glaring at JC, Joey got off the coach, grabbed his jacket and left the room.
Which, he had to admit, was probably JC's intention form the very beginning.
But he was not going to go to the studio.
He wasn't going
to think about recording a note until either he found out who the
fifth member was, or Jhonny
admitted it was a mistake and called the whole thing off.
Loosing Loomie wasn't a challenge. His bodyguard wasn't as used as before to Joey's little acts, so it was just a question of minutes before he was alone in the streets of Orlando.
He didn't know where he was going. He just wanted to be alone for a while.
And he ended up in Universal studios again, drown by memories and might bes.
* * *
"It's step, step, turn, step, Chris." Wade Robson instructed,
tiredly. He and Chris had been working for the past two
days almost non stop, in one of the studios at Universal, right next door
to where the *N Sync band was rehearsing.
"Sorry, Wade." Chris said, smiling and bouncing on his heels.
Every bone in his body ached, and he felt every
single muscle burning, but he wasn't tired. He felt full of energy. Of
course, the fact that he had been drinking coke
the two days instead of water or Gatorade, and that he had coffee with
his breakfast every day because his mother
and sisters weren't around to stop him could be the reason for that. "Do
we try it one more time?"
"Sure." Wade answered the smile, and soon they were again going
through 'It's gonna be me', one of the few *N
Sync choreographies that didn't require the whole group in the rehearsal.
Earlier, Lance had been around, and he and
Chris had tried a couple of steps that Wade wanted to add to 'I want you
back', which Chris had mastered fairly quickly.
Jhonny had stopped
there a couple of times, apparently very happy with Chris' performance.
And Wade had
mentioned a lot of times that he was glad to have someone that flexible
and awake during rehearsals, so
things in that side were running smoothly.
The singing part,
however, wasn't going as fine as it should. Chris had learned most of
the songs lyrics, but
without the others, it was impossible to him to learn the harmonic sequences
right.
When Lance went,
they advanced a little more than what Chris did alone with the vocal coach,
but since Lance
wasn't one of the main solo singers, there was still a long way to go.
It was at moments
like those that Chris whished that Jhonny and Lance weren't so set on
the idea of the
surprise meeting. Not only the songs would sound better if he could rehearse
with the group, he would spend more
time with Joey.
Bobbie was still in L.A. and she hadn't heard from Danny, and that made Chris feel uneasy.
He couldn't help but feeling that Danny would ruin his whole life, given the chance.
* * *
While
the others actually tried to comply with Jive's decisions, Joey couldn't.
Not when his whole life was
upside down.
He had tried talking with AJ, now that the Backstreet Boys were back in the USA, but his friends was too busy with the band own problems. Apparently, even when Brian had finally gotten with the program and accepted Kevin and Howie's new found love, he was still having some troubles accepting other things that had come to the light of day, and was now actively ignoring AJ.
So while everyone rehearsed the new steps, and the new arrangements, and studied the new 'how *N Sync really meet' story, Joey went to Universal, to drown his sorrows in memories.
He listened to
the Hi-Tones sing, wondering how they would have sounded when Chris was
in the group.
Remembering the days when he worked there, in the hot werewolf suit, and
wondering how things would have
worked out if he had meet Chris back then.
Sometimes, he was
spotted. And he signed autographs, and let people take pictures with him,
talked with the fans and kept the façade that everything was going
on smoothly. He wasn't a bad actor. He had managed to
keep a straight face even when a girl had asked him about the rumor of
the fifth member of *N Sync, about the fact
that he was a friend of JC back from MMC and stuff.
"You're looking for another boyfriend to steal?" The rough
voice pulled him out of his memories, and he frowned
upon seeing its owner.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" He growled at Chris' ex- boyfriend's smirking face.
"This is a free country, last time I checked." Daniel answered, still grinning. "I was just looking for Chris, you know?"
"Chris isnt' here." Joey almost barked. He wasn't going to show weakness in front of Chris' ex.
"Isn't he?" Danny shook his head, looking frustrated. "Oh,
well. I guess you must be telling me the truth. After all,
Chris wouldn't risk it coming back here. I was just curious, since he
quit his job in L.A. and hasn't returned to Albany…"
"What do you mean 'risk coming back here'?!" Joey almost didn't
hear the last part of Daniel's words, and was trying
to stop himself from shoving the jerk against the nearest wall. "What
did you do to him?!"
"I just mentioned some pictures I got of your last visit here, Mr.Fatone."
Daniel's eyes narrowed, and Joey knew that
the tall blonde was counting on the fact that Joey would never hit him.
"But I see that I was wrong. I shouldn't have
told my elf about them. I should have come right to you. I know you're
still trying to contact my…"
"He ain't yours." It was taking every ounce of willpower Joey had not to hit Daniel.
"That's what you think, Mr. Pop star." The designer laughed.
"I'll just tell you what I told him. If I ever see you
two together again, I'll tell the world that Joey Fatone of *N Sync likes
to drive stick."
That was the last
straw for Joey. In a split second, his brain put finally two and two together:
Daniel had seen
Chris, before Chris left Joey. Danny had threatened Chris with outing
Joey. Chris had left to protect Joey.
And that, that was too much for Joey. Without thinking, he punched Daniel Windsor once, right in the nose, and felt satisfied when he heard a bone crush.
Without looking back, he walked to the parking lot and his car. He had a lot of work to do, and he wasn't going to loose time thinking about the slug named Daniel Windsor.
* * *
"What's this?" Chris asked, looking at the closed envelope
Jhonny Wright had given him. He was again in the closed
set, but this time he wasn't alone. Jhonny and Wade were there, and so
were Lance, Nick, Brian and AJ. Even when
Brian wasn't talking to AJ, the three Backstreet Boys were the only ones
who knew about Chris' new job and had offered to help him get the harmonies
right.
They had done a lot of advance on *N Sync old songs, and were swiftly working their way up all the songs from No Strings Attached, and the few that had been already selected for the upcoming record.
And that day, Jhonny had interrupted the rehearsal to hand Chris a white envelope.
"Your first payment, Chris." Jhonny answered. "Usually, we just deposit them on your bank account, but I figured you would like to see the first check."
"But… But… I haven't done anything!" Chris couldn't
believe it. He looked at the envelope as if it would bite
him, not noticing the amused looks of everyone else.
"You've been working your ass off for the past three weeks, Chirs,
learning everything we took five years to
learn." Lance told him, shrugging. " And, you quit your other
job to be here so you deserve it. Go ahead, take a
look."
Nervously, Chris did as Lance said, and when he saw the number written on the check, his eyes grew twice as big. "No way! This is… WOW!"
"You think the surprise gave you enough energy to continue, Chris?"
Wade asked, amused. He and Chris had
become good friends during the past weeks, and the choreographer had quickly
learned that giving the teacher
sugar meant having to deal with a bundle of pure energy. And Chris had
been drinking coke again.
"Sure!" Chris placed the envelope on his jacket pocket, and
bounced to his place, while Lance did the same, only
that a little slower. The Backstreet Boys only watched, each holding the
lyrics of the songs in their hands, as it
was unfair to ask them to learn the choreographies too.
"Which one you want to tackle now?" Since Chris knew most of
the routines already, Wade liked to let him choose
which ones needed more work. And this time, the offer made Chris smile
twice as brightly.
"Just Got Paid, of course!" As soon as the words were out of
Chris' mouth, Nick pressed the play button on the CD,
laughing. They sang, Nick supplying Justin's parts, AJ doing Joey's and
Brian working with JC's. It had been
quickly decided that Chris' voice did a nice counterpoint to Justin's
voice, and with Nick's help, the theory had proven true.
But that day, Chris
couldn't hold himself. He was too happy. The check was enough for him
to send to his
mother, to insure that Kate wouldn't need to keep the half-time job she
had for a long while, allowing her to
concentrate fully on College. And he was fulfilling his dream to perform.
And he was going to be at Joey's side.
And, before he
knew it, when the second choir was sung, and the music interlude came
in, the words were out of his mouth, to punctuate his feelings. "
Now I know you thought you had me played, check is in the mail I got it
made, And if you'll notice my smile is like Kool-Aid, Cuz I just got paid!"
* * *
Nick couldn't help but smile when Chris stopped, suddenly noting everyone's eyes on him. The free-style rap the teacher had just included right in the middle of the song not only fit, but also showed Jhonny that Lance and Nick hadn't lied. Chris was truly a golden addition for *N Sync.
He sang, he danced, he rapped.
And he had the energy of a ten year old.
"What? Did I do something wrong?" Chris was asking, his eyes
wide like those of a child who had just been caught
with the hand in the cookie jar.
"No, Chris." Jhonny was the one to answer, finally getting
over the shock. "Where did you heard that version of the
lyrics?"
"The Kool-Aid part?" Chris cocked his head to one side, before smiling. "Just thought of it, sorry."
"Don't be sorry." Jhonny said, a strange smile on his face.
"Write it down. We might want to use that for the live
concerts."
That small comment
was enough to fuel Chris for other three hours, much to everyone's amazement.
It was as if Chris was finally understanding that this was for real, that
he was really going to be a part of Joey's group… Now the others
just had to remember not to feed sugar to him. For what Nick had seen,
now that Chris was surrendered by confidence and people who didn't mock
him or told him to 'act his age', he was quickly becoming the most
hyperactive person Nick had ever seen.
*N Sync was going to have their hands full.
And in a good way. Which meant that Nick could actually start worrying about his own group. Things were not so good. Finally, and against all Jive decisions, Kevin had talked to Kristen, and asked her for the divorce, explaining her everything.
Everyone had expected Kristen to be mad. But she hadn't even screamed once. According to Kevin, she had just smiled, patted him on the shoulder and confessed she had been having an affair with AJ for months.
Kevin had forgiven
AJ. Mostly because through the months of his marriage, he had been lusting
after Howie,
and thus, he had too been cheating on Kristen. Brian, however, couldn't
believe that AJ had been an active part
on Kristen's cheating, and wasn't speaking to either AJ or Kristen. At
least, he had no more troubles with Howie,
Kevin or Nick.
In fact, Nick only had to convince Brian to stop pestering him on the subject of telling Justin how he really felt for him.
* * *
Joey couldn't remember a time when he had been more nervous for TRL. Today was the day.
They were going to introduce the fifth *N Syncer to the public and, in some weird ass idea of keeping the 'we're in total synchrony' image, and the 'it's an old friend of us', they didn't know who the fifth was yet.
Except for Lance. Joey was sure Lance knew who the fifth was. He had to, because Jhonny had instructed that Lance was going to be the one talking, at least until the question and answer part, which was going to be after they sang together "I drive myself crazy".
But that was not why Joey was nervous. He couldn't care less if the whole thing sucked. He was nervous because he had decided that, if the dating question came up (And it was going to come up, he was sure of it), he was going to come out clean.
He wasn't going to let Daniel Windsor win. If he came out in front of MTV, Chris would know that there was no reason for him to bend to Daniel's black mail.
Strangely, they
had been allowed to dress themselves for this. That was a rare occasion,
since usually, they had a swarm of people deciding what could they wear.
Looking at JC's pants, which had a reproduction of a Boticcelli
painting, Joey understood why Jive felt the need of dressing them from
time to time. His own choice of
clothing was a little less garish, at least from waist up as he was wearing
a blue shirt over a light blue shirt. It was
the pants, a misshaped mix of brown, black and blue patches, what had
made Jhonny roll his eyes before letting
them out of the bus.
Lance was finishing
his speech about friendship, and missing chances, and stuff Joey couldn't
care less at the
moment, and Carlson asked why didn't Lance called their old friend by
his name.
"Oh, we thought it would be nice to let him introduce himself." Lance answered.
"Is he here?" Carson asked, with a passable look of surprise
on his face, and the girls in the audience yelled,
excited.
"Sure. In fact, what if you guys hear him sing first, and then we
continue with the questions?" Justin added, following
the script perfectly. Now Joey was supposed to turn to the stage meet
whoever that was supposed to be his oldest
friend whom he hadn't seen in years, and say something like 'let's do
it, man', but when he did, he couldn't talk.
Because standing on the center of the stage, smiling his childlike smile, wearing a faded pair of blue jeans, a white t- shirt under a black shirt and a stripped shirt, was Chris.
Who
smiled at him, and, as the music started, began to sing.
"Lying in your arms
So close together
Didn't know just what I had
Now I toss and turn
Cause I'm without you
How I'm missing you so bad
Where was my head
Where was my heart
Now I cry alone in the dark..."
* * *
Chris managed to
keep singing when the group got up from their seats to walk to his side,
in the middle of the
TRL stage. He was nervous, and his hands were sweating, but he just kept
his eyes glued on Joey, and tried to ignore the screaming girls.
"I drive myself crazy" He sang, and smiled at Justin, who clasped
his shoulder before turning to see the audience,
beaming.
"Wanting you the way that I do…" And he had to admit,
once that they all were together, they really sound right.
Even better than when he sang with Brian, AJ and Nick. In fact, judging
by the girls' rising screams, it was working.
"Wanting you the way that I do..." Joey sang those words looking
right into Chris' eyes, not touching him directly, but
it was not needed. Those eyes told Chris all he needed to know, and he
smiled back, for the first time completely
sure that everything was going to be all right.
* * *
TRL usually had a very good rating, but that day, the rating was going through the roof. Every girl between 13 and 18 had heard the rumor that *N Sync was going to introduce the new member of the group, and everyone wanted to know.
Rumors were a funny thing, and by the time the show started, there were some girls who swore the new member of the group was their old literature teacher, while others said that it was a friend of the Backstreet Boys.
When they saw the
guy, standing on the stage, some thought he was dreamy, some others that
he was cute,
and there were a couple who didn't know what to think. When he sang, they
all blinked, surprised.
By the time the song ended, they all were glued to the phones, talking to their friends about the new guy, or trying to reach TRL through the phone to ask the new guy a question.
And in *N Sync bus, Jhonny Wright smiled as in the TV set Chris explained joyfully the reasons why he had left Universal in the first place, while JC carried on their dream of forming a band.
Because now, now *N Sync was going to be big.
It was a promise
he saw in the way the eyes of the group shone now, between happiness and
shock, and the way the girls squealed and giggled when Chris spoke. In
the way that the girls had accepted with a shocked 'really?!
Wow!' the fact that Chris was gay.
Oh, yeah. Now the group was really where they belonged. At the top.